First order of business: the past and next couple of weeks are ones of transition as I move back to my Second City and start my sophomore year of college…Thus I might not (won’t) have every post on time. I give you my most sincere apologies in advance.
Second order of business: I moved into my new apartment this weekend!!! And it’s a wreck. Hope to have that cleaned up by Tuesday. Despite that, it already kind of feels like home. This will be the third night I have spent here. I’ve figured out which light switches turn on which outlets, moved my roommate’s bed out of the living room and into the bedroom, and cooked something in the microwave. The cabinets have food and bowls and plates and plastic silverware in them. The refrigerator has ice trays and fresh fruit in it. It’s all starting to come together.
This year’s transition was much easier than last years. Last year I came to a brand new (much bigger) city where I knew absolutely no one. I didn’t know any streets. I didn’t know the campus. And I didn’t know what college would be like. Then I met one of the most important people in the world to me. It was the end of the first week of classes, I was trying to decide if I wanted to stick out the semester or just go ahead and leave, and she plopped down in front of me (I was eating lunch in the cafeteria -alone). She changed everything.
The Dashwoods had a similar experience, except they had less time to prepare for their move. But they had to throw themselves upon the mercy of others and trust them to help them out in a completely foreign environment. The people are what saved the Dashwoods. Those willing to take an interest and make an effort to reach out to them made all the difference. Granted, those people were not pure angels…but that human connection and compassion changed everything.
Although nowhere near as difficult as last year, this year’s move has had its challenges. For completely different reasons I found leaving my home to be emotionally difficult. I expected to be torn when I arrived, home sick, feeling guilty for what I was leaving behind…but when I saw the skyline I realized that this is home too. Living in two places is not for the faint of heart. It’s a balancing act, one I am learning and will continue to learn as long as I live in two different cities. But again, it is the people who make the difference – the people who love and care for me from long distance and the same room. No man is an island (I <3 John Donne). No woman – at least not this nearly 20 year old – can go it alone. Family – blood or not – and friends are the ones who make it possible to pack up as much as possible and go six hours from what is most comfortable to a place that is uncomfortable and mostly unfamiliar.
The Dashwoods came to be able to depend upon some of their family and their friends. Although it can be down-right frightening to trust so much, that is what I have learned to do as well. Because being at school provides endless opportunities for growth and development. It is a gift to be here. Learning to trust others is part of that gift of growth.
The door home is still very open for me. But in moving, many more have been opened. I chose to move. The Dashwoods did not. But I think that one of Jane’s motives in thrusting the Dashwoods into the harsh world and forcing them to depend on others was to show that there are so many opportunities created. For them it came in the form of husbands. For me, education. But beyond that, it is the ability to trust and depend on others.
Next week: I’m not really sure at this point. I trust that something will come to me. I’ll be very busy this week so it’ll probably be this weekend again.
P.S. If you followed or got anything out of the rambling word vomit that occurred above – I applaud you. Please take a moment to pat yourself on the back. And my most sincere thanks.
Till next week!
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